Gmail Motion! Stay In Shape While Sending Email

It's time for Google to unveil another great new program, and what an awesome one it is! Check it out, now you can control gmail with your body:

Beyond the incredible technological advancements there are only a few easy moves required to learn and you'll have the side benefit of getting in shape while you send and read your mail. 

By the way Google, I'm still not happy about be overlooked for the Google Copernicus Hosting Environment and Experiment in Search Engineering (G.C.H.E.E.S.E.)  program in 2007!

Google's Cognitive Auteheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity

April 1st is my favourite day of the year, for it is the day that the great minds at Google unleash their creative powers on the world in an attempt to bring humour to the masses and pull the wool over the eyes of the gullible. This years April Fool's joke is the announcement of CADIE: Cognitive Auteheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity. CADIE is bringing a host of new features to the google offerings including Gmail Autopilot, which answers your e-mail for you, Chrome updated for use with red-and-blue 3D glasses, and Picasa Web Albums feature to add red-eye to your photos, as well as Brain Search for Mobile.

"...We started this project as a continuation of mankind's perpetual quest to learn the nature of reason and what defines us as humans. We would have been pleased if we achieved nothing more than a system that passed a Turing test - i.e. that wrote a symphony but didn't necessarily know it had done so. However, while we still think of CADIE as a young entity, we are convinced now that she has evolved her own "strong AI" presence. We continue to conduct tests, but increasingly, we conduct long conversations with her, acutely aware that our creation will raise many ethical questions on the part of the public. Will humans be surpassed by artificial evolution? Will we lose our sense of uniqueness, and if so, what would that mean? In which direction will CADIE's consciousness evolve? How is she going to be held accountable, if at all? Will CADIE herself at some point connect her own electromagnetic dots in some idiosyncratic manner which turns her into something we are no longer capable of understanding in any sort of productive way, much as that aforementioned toddler, waving at herself in the mirror, leaves primates forever behind in their own tragically limited world?

We don't know. Did you really think we possibly could?

The CADIE Team
March 31st, 2009
11:59pm"

Virgin Group and Google Combine Forces in Virgle - Hope To Colonize Mars

In what has become an April 1st tradition, Google's latest press release pokes a little fun at the rest of us. The release explains the company's plans to join forces with Sir Richard Branson Virgin Group President and Founder to start a new human colony on Mars named Virgle. “Virgle is the ultimate application of a principle we’ve always believed at Google: that you can do well by doing good,” said Google co-founder Larry Page. "We feel that ensuring the survival of the human race by helping it colonize a new planet is both a moral good in and of itself and also the most likely method of ensuring the survival of our best – okay, fine, only -- base of web search volume and advertising inventory,” Page added. “So, you know, it's, like, win-win." To be included in the original contingent of Virgle-ites the team will be selecting participants based on an "online questionnaire, video submission, personal accomplishments, expertise in scientific, artistic, sociological and/or political fields of endeavor, and inadequate Google and Virgin personal performance reviews."